Reopened Wounds on a Still Bleeding Heart
by New Decade
Summary: She couldn't change the past and she couldn't stop her past from attacking the future. She never asked to go home again.


The great thing about a character we've never seen on the show (only heard little things about) is that a fanfic writer gets to experiment and have some fun. So, I played around a little with the idea of Calleigh's mother and…well, you'll see. Since we don't know her name (first or her surname) I've made them up ;)

BTW: As previously stated, I trust fan websites for very little info, especially when it comes to Cal and I just go by the show. Because I'm a dork and invested my money in the DVD area and dedicated many nights to channel 32, I have seen all 222 Miami episodes, plus its spin off from CSI: LV and I can say that I have never noticed any indication of Cal having sibs. So, sorry, Cal, but in my mind you're an only child.

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><p>Calleigh removed the clip that held the hairstyle she had been donning throughout the day. The elegant twist fell and waves of hair cascaded down her back like a waterfall of cornsilk. She placed the clip on the granite countertop of the sink and gently tousled the strands of her hair; feeling relieved that the clip was no longer imprisoning the locks as they could now flow freely.<p>

She looked up to the mirror to face her reflection. She saw Calleigh Duquesne, minus the usual glow in her eyes that seemed to have departed for the weekend, in a lavender dress and a frown that contradicted the supposedly happy event that had occurred that day. But Calleigh, despite her best efforts, couldn't see this event in a positive light and found herself wearing an artificial smile throughout the entire day. Now, she took a moment for her reflection to reveal to her how she had been feeling all day. There were dark circles under her eyes, eyeliner running slightly, her skin was pale enough to make her appear ill and all emotion seemed to have withdrawn itself from her face.

Only when another person joined her reflection did a small grin begin to hint on her lips. Eric, who had already removed his jacket and undone his bow tie, came up from behind her and gently wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her into him as he planted a kiss on her neck.

"Are you okay?" he asked, softly, noticing her saddened features. This had been the same question he had repeated multiple times within their week stay in Darnell, Calleigh's hometown.

"Yeah," Calleigh nodded; this had been her repeated answer for the last seven days. She stepped out of Eric's arms and sat down on the motel bed. "I'm happy for them," she sighed, pulling off one of the shoes that matched her dress.

The "them" Calleigh was referring to was the newly married Mr. Owen Roberts and Mrs. Sue Roberts. However, mere hours before, she had been Ms. Sue Dickens and, a few years before that, she had been Mrs. Sue Duquesne, though Calleigh referred to her as "Mom."

Calleigh had always known it was an undying possibility that her parents would marry someone else one day and she had thought she would have been truly thrilled they had found happiness. But when she received an invitation to the wedding a few months back, she had began to feel uneasy about the situation and not just because she didn't even know her mother had been in any kind of romantic relationship until the heavily decorated invite was in her hand.

Little did she know that it was the start of many surprises.

First of many was that, not moments after Calleigh and Eric, who had willingly come with his girlfriend (sensing she would need someone to confide in), had checked into their motel, there was a knock at the door. Calleigh hadn't expected to see any of her family members until the day of the wedding, except perhaps one or two before hand, but she certainly didn't count on her mother showing up at their motel. The shock had hit Calleigh so ridiculously hard she had to blink several times before realizing that her mother, who she hadn't seen in the flesh since she left Darnell over a decade ago, was the woman standing before her. Sue still had her long blonde hair, though slightly bleached by the sun, and the freckles along her nose and cheeks that gave her a childlike look. A shy grin touched Sue's lips and she, almost hesitantly, opened up her arms to Calleigh, who returned the hug even though it felt as awkward to Calleigh as she was sure it felt to Sue. Affection had never been one of her mother's strong suits and their time apart didn't seem to have any effect on that part of their relationship.

As Calleigh came to see that week, not a great deal about her and her mother's relationship had changed. Whenever Calleigh saw her throughout the week, Sue and herself carried on as they had all of Calleigh's life. They were civil and they talked, mostly the usual small talk ("How've you been?" "How is work?" "Calleigh, Eric seems awfully sweet." "Nice weather we are having.") and remained completely impersonal, no topic last for more than a few brief phrases before proceeding to the next subject. Calleigh hadn't been expecting anything less, knowing Sue was as she was and Calleigh had never questioned if she could change. The only action Sue took that surprised Calleigh during the days leading up to the wedding was she asked Calleigh if she would be interested in being a bridesmaid in the ceremony along with her two new soon-to-be stepsisters and her oldest cousin. Slightly amazed by the offer, Calleigh accepted, mostly because there was a twinkle in Sue's eyes that made it appear as though she truly wanted Calleigh to be apart of one of the "greatest days of her life." Sue also said it would be a good way for Calleigh to get to know her future stepsisters, Tiffany and Amanda. However, the first time Calleigh spoke to them, she highly doubted that they would make much progress to assume anything remotely close to a "sisterly" relationship.

Tiffany and Amanda, only eighteen months apart and very much alike; both had married young and had proudly stated they stayed at home with their children while their husbands worked some desk job—Calleigh couldn't remember the official title. When Calleigh informed them she wasn't married and made a living investigating murders and obsessing over guns, they looked mortified. She wasn't sure which had frightened them more; her job, her love for firearms or the fact she was in her thirties and had yet to settle down. Calleigh had the feeling after the wedding she wouldn't be hearing from them for awhile, if ever.

Calleigh had attempted to keep an open mind when it came to Owen. She tried to, as Eric said, "give him a chance", but most of that open-mindedness flew out the window upon their first meeting. The first thing Calleigh noticed about Owen was the way he held onto her mother, his hand always placed on her thigh or knee and his arm always wrapped securely around her waist. The sight was strange to Calleigh, no one had ever come in such a close proximity to her mother in Calleigh's memory, not even Kenwall during the time he and Sue had been married, save for in a few pictures from their earlier years together. But besides the way Owen held Sue, there was only one other similarity between him and Kenwall; they both had an addiction. Only instead of alcohol, Owen craved nicotine, and a lot of it, constantly lighting cigarette upon cigarette and exhaling the smoke through his mouth and nostrils. He had probably smoked an entire pack before Eric and Calleigh left; Eric later told Calleigh that night he was worried the amount of smoke Owen was producing would make her lung condition rear its ugly head once again.

Passed those two slim comparisons, Owen and Kenwall had absolutely nothing in common. Owen's religious views were different, his political views, his views on life, the way he went about parenting, his sense of humor and every other detail imaginable was the polar opposite of how Kenwall would have presented himself. Calleigh had the feeling it was that very fact; Owen was the opposite of her first husband, was what attracted her to him the most. However, this was what instantly put him out of Calleigh's favor. She was very well aware her father had a drinking problem, but the bottom line was that Kenwall was her dad and he had many good qualities and Sue seemed to be rejecting even those characteristics by finding different ones in Owen.

But perhaps the final surprise was the most painful for Calleigh and the fact it had hurt her made it all the more astonishing, for she hadn't expected something along those lines to hurt her.

She had survived the wedding ceremony, putting her own acute animosity for Owen aside to allow her mother the happiness of falling in love again and smiled as they slid rings onto the other's finger. At the reception, held at one of the country clubs, Calleigh had lost Eric among the large number of guests. Calleigh searched, looking for any sign of Eric or the bride and groom to congratulate them. All the while she ignored the whispers of the elderly women of the community, whose heads all leaned in closer together every time Calleigh walked by. She had expected this, in all honesty, for the gossips to talk amongst themselves of how "Calleigh Duquesne left this town the first chance she got and never looked back."

Calleigh found herself rolling her eyes at some of the comments she heard, mostly exaggerated rumors about how her life was in Miami, and she refused to let any of them bother her. Besides, she saw Sue and Owen standing together and decided to take the moment to congratulate the two on their union. She had been about to call out to them when her mother saw someone out of Calleigh's sight in the other direction and she excitedly hollered to them.

"Tiffany! Amanda!" she almost shouted, her voice thrilled. Sue had caught their attention and gestured for the two to come her way. The sisters, in both dresses identical to Calleigh's, rushed towards their father and new stepmother.

When at arms reach Sue absolutely threw her arms around Amanda as Tiffany hugged her father. Calleigh stopped dead in her tracks to see the way her mother pulled Amanda tighter into her arms and kissed her cheek, simultaneously stroking Amanda's strawberry-blonde hair. The smile that came to Sue's face was one that Calleigh had never seen on her lips; however, she had seen it on plenty of other people. Calleigh saw it on Carmen whenever Eric or one of her daughters walked into the room, it was there whenever Eric's sisters were with their children and she saw it on Alexx when Calleigh went over to her house and Jamie and Brian were present. For the first time in her memory, Calleigh saw the same maternal smile on Sue she had only dreamed of seeing and it knocked the wind out of Calleigh. Sue was hugging, kissing and smiling at the woman in her arms who had only been accepted into the family by marriage, even though a few days ago she couldn't be so free when it came to wrapping her arms around her own daughter.

Calleigh felt a medley of emotions impact her, ranging from shock, hurt and anger, but mostly she felt cold, despite the muggy Louisiana air.

Eric saw Calleigh at that point and she was standing with her eyes fixated on something in her line of sight and unmoving, despite the people walking in front of her. As he came closer, he saw her face was sculpted perfectly and, to the untrained eyes, could be seen as a face that lacked any sense of emotion. But Eric knew this was just her poker face and that behind the orchestrated features was a woman who had suffered a dreadful blow to the heart.

Eric followed the direction in which her eyes were facing and his heart ached for her as he saw Sue holding one of her stepdaughters affectionately. Calleigh may have seldom spoken of her mother, but Eric had gathered enough information over the years to get a basic idea of how her mother had been during Calleigh's childhood. Sue wasn't a bad person, not by any means, but perhaps with her ex-husband's work and alcoholism she began to feel unloved and accidentally took it out on their young daughter by withdrawing the same love. Instead, what manifested was more of a friendship between the two and it left a teenage girl feeling alone for she felt there was no one to turn to if certain kind of advice was needed, leaving Calleigh to figure things out for herself.

Calleigh probably never realized there was an alternative when it came to affection and her mother, she had always accepted the way things were. But seeing this scene play out in front of her, Eric wondered if Calleigh was beginning to think about how life could have been had _this _Sue been there for Calleigh, and that was enough to make his heart break for her.

"Cal?" he asked, softly, reaching up to rest his hand on her shoulder. "Are you okay?"

Calleigh turned to look up at him, in doing so her composure fell for just a second and he could see in her emerald eyes the pain, the anger and the "what ifs" clearly, as though her eyes were the gateway to the hell she was experiencing inside. But then she blinked, swallowed some air, and the gates closed and she was perfectly composed once again.

"I'm fine," Calleigh nodded. "I'm going to get a drink, you want one?"

By the time the night ended, Calleigh managed to suppress her hurt for a few moments to go over to Sue and Owen to say how happy she was for them. Owen gave her a hug and Sue did take her in her arms, though it didn't feel the same as she imagined it would have had she been Tiffany or Amanda, for the tension was thick enough to cut with a knife.

She had been replaying the moment constantly in her mind for hours and even now, as she slid off her shoes, the image of her mom's loving smile still plagued her.

Eric let a sad grin touch his lips as he came to take a seat beside Calleigh on the bed.

"I really am happy for them," she said, softly as she removed her earrings and placed them on the table, beside the alarm clock, the telephone book and a Bible supplied by the motel.

Eric wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into his side. "I'm not worried about them," he whispered.

Calleigh laughed lightly. "You know, you'd have a lot more free time for a real hobby if you didn't spend all of it worrying about me."

"I do have another hobby," he shrugged a shoulder.

"Being?" Calleigh asked.

Eric leaned down to lovingly kiss Calleigh, her lips slightly viscous due to her lipstick, but they were still soft and sweet. She returned his kiss, though it was apparent her mind was somewhere else and his plan to distract her wasn't working. Even when the kiss broke, she smiled at him, but the smile didn't quite reach her eyes.

"I like that hobby," she joked as Eric absentmindedly played with a stand of her hair. He was realizing that sitting with her for a few moments wasn't going to be enough to make Calleigh open up to him about this particular matter, even though she had been telling him what was on her mind more and more in the recent years.

Eric went to plan B and pulled out his phone. "You know, I never got to dance with you today," he said, scrolling through the list of songs on his phone.

"Consider yourself lucky," she sighed. "I'm not the best dancer."

"I'll be the judge of that," Eric smirked, selecting a song and placing his phone on the bed. A soft melody and lyrics to match began as Eric got up and offered his hand to Calleigh who smiled at the cheesy, albeit romantic, gesture and took his hand to be pulled off the bed.

Eric wrapped his arms around her waist, his fingers interlocking against the small of her back as she snaked her arms around his neck. Calleigh wasn't sure if simply swaying side to side to the beat was considered dancing, but it was enough to relax her slightly and she found some mild peace being with Eric.

"I love this about you," she said, softly.

"What?" Eric asked.

Calleigh sighed. "I love that no matter how crappy the day has been, you somehow always make me smile."

He chuckled and pulled her closer to him, now in more of an embrace than a dance pose.

"Well, I like seeing you happy," he said, his lips forming into the grin she had fallen in love with.

Calleigh slid one of her hands the side of his face, her thumb brushing over where the light stubble had been shaved away for the wedding.

"You make me very, very happy," she whispered.

Eric rested his forehead against hers, his eyes searching her face and finding the truth. "But you're not very happy right now, are you?"

Once again, Eric seemed to be able to read through her façade to see that she wasn't as "fine" as she had constantly repeated.

"It's a change," she stated with a shrug. "Change is always hard to deal with."

"But change isn't what's on your mind right now, is it?" Eric assumed.

Calleigh sighed, heavily. "You're starting to scare me."

Eric could see getting her to talk would be a slow process, but he was patient. "I saw you today, Cal."

She didn't quite know how to respond, her fingers lingered on his cheek awhile longer before lowering her arm. They were no longer swaying and the second verse of the song was drawing to a close.

She racked her brain for an unrelated topic as a way to change the subject, but an idea was unable to emerge and she was left with no other choice but to answer.

"It's just frustrating…and a bit hurtful," Calleigh admitted. "You know, I just always figured the way she was with me was just who she was and I never _imagined _there was an alternative."

She let the words hover in the air and linger in her mind before taking in another deep breath then proceeded to continue. "And the worst part is I can't think of the reason why she was so different with me when I was a kid."

By this point, the ballad had ended and the song switched to something with a more up-beat tempo. Calleigh sat on the bed, picking up the phone in her hand and hitting the button, stopping the music entirely and the wallpaper of his phone appeared on the screen. She shook her head at the picture of herself lying in bed, her hair fanned out across the pillow and her eyes were closed. Calleigh had attempted to get Eric to change the wallpaper several times, never succeeding. She had changed it herself one time, but he, of course, promptly switched it back.

Calleigh set the phone beside the lamp and then ran her hands though her hair.

Eric circled the bed and looped his arms around Calleigh's waist from behind. He slowly pulled her down to lie in bed beside him. She shifted her weight and rolled in his arms to face him, grinning at just how comfortable this felt. Calleigh removed the black material that would tie into a handsome bowtie from his collar and began to unbutton his shirt as she pressed her lips to his. She wanted him to distract her, to forget about today, and focus on him…that's all that mattered.

But Eric took her hands in his, halting her actions. He kissed her back, but it was too reserved and hesitant; not what she was looking for.

"Calleigh," he whispered, gently leaning out of the kiss.

"I'm fine," she insisted, reading his mind. "I'll never know the reason why, so what's the use worrying about it? I don't know how to talk to her about it, she probably wouldn't understand and she wouldn't tell me if she did."

"You may want to ask her one day," Eric pointed out.

"Maybe. But not today, besides, I'm not going to call her on their…their _honeymoon_." The word tasted bitter on her lips. "So we may as well have a little bit of fun on our time off," she said, seductively, one of her hands escaping Eric's hold to glide across her chest. She had managed to undo a few buttons of his tuxedo shirt to reveal his white undershirt, her fingers now dancing lightly over the material.

Eric rolled his eyes as she collided her lips with his, more forceful this time, more demanding rather than asking. She felt Eric kissing her back and she smiled, slightly relieved, as he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him. But his lips once again withdrew themselves to look at her.

"Why do _you _think she was different with you?" he asked, kindly.

Calleigh sighed and sat up. "You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"Not when it's hurting you this badly," he said, placing a supportive hand on her thigh. "And I know it's hurting you."

Calleigh rolled her lips, Eric was right. This was slowly eating her from the inside out and no amount of sexual distractions would erase it.

"So, why do you think she was the way she was?" Eric asked again.

"That's just it, I don't know what to think," she shook her head. "Maybe because I wasn't planned, maybe she was distracted by the crap with my dad, maybe…"

"Maybe she's jealous of you," Eric suggested.

"Jealous of me?" Calleigh repeated, appalled. The thought of anybody being envious of Calleigh was a concept she couldn't wrap her head around, especially the thought of her _mother _being the one to be the source of the jealousy.

"Yeah, of your strength."

"Please," Calleigh scoffed.

"I'm serious," Eric insisted. "You're a strong woman and I know you were a strong kid. Maybe she was amazed someone could be stronger than she was at a young age." Eric noticed at this point Calleigh still didn't believe him as she rolled her eyes. "And maybe because you were so strong, she thought you didn't need her and she didn't know what to do."

She thought about that option for a moment as Eric's thumb brushed soothingly against the fabric that covered her thigh. It was definitely probable, logical even. But accepting that as an answer meant accepting that her mother was withdrawn from Calleigh in a way she potentially wouldn't have been had she been born a different person, a Tiffany or an Amanda.

"My mom and I were probably just too different," Calleigh sighed in admittance.

"But she does love you," Eric said, strong certainty in his voice.

"I know," she nodded.

"And so do I," Eric whispered, giving her a warm smile in hopes of improving her mood. Calleigh looked down at Eric, her lips spreading into a grateful grin. He was happy with who she was and didn't hold back his love. That was a two way street; Calleigh wouldn't change a single force could stop her from loving him.

"I love you, too," she grinned slightly, her voice soft. Eric sat up in the bed beside Calleigh, leaning on the wooden backboard, which let out a long droning creak against his weight.

"Now, be honest, are you going to be okay?" he asked, patiently.

Calleigh thought about it before giving an honest nod. "I'll be fine once the thought isn't so new. This time tomorrow we'll be back in Miami and things can go back to normal."

"Okay," he said, intertwining his fingers through hers and giving them a gentle squeeze. "I'm here if you want to talk about it."

Calleigh gently nudged him with her elbow. "I know. And thanks for coming."

"No problem," Eric said, not admitting that while she and the bridal party walked down the aisle he allowed his overactive imagination to picture Calleigh walking to meet him at the alter to exchange their vows.

Eric leaned in to press his lips to hers, sharing a kiss before she half sighed, half chuckled. "I'd better get out of this dress." She tried to reach behind her to undo the hook of her dress.

Eric snaked his arms around her middle and brought her back towards him to unhook the back and pull the zipper down its track.

"Thanks," Calleigh said, gratefully, sliding out of the dress and into one of Eric's old T-shirts, Eric himself was stripping from his formal attire until he was down to his boxers and tank top.

Calleigh nestled herself against Eric's torso, her head resting comfortably on his sternum, rising and falling with each breath he took.

"Twelve more hours until we are on the way home, Cal," he whispered, comfortingly, before pressing his lips to her hair, sensing her urge to escape Darnell at the earliest possibility.

Calleigh merely grinned and wrapped her arms tighter around him, not telling Eric that just lying here against him, with his lips gracing her skin and whispering in her ear was more than enough to heal any wound Darnell could have given her.


End file.
